1. Male Friends - I used to have lots of them, now I only have a couple, and all but one live hundreds of miles away. Men need Men to stay on the right path of being a Man.
2. A Burning Goal - one that I even if I wanted to, I wouldn't be able to "not" do something about. I don't have one of those, I've got some "ideas" but that's not the same as a goal, a mission, a pursuit. Something that is big, but achievable - but is always smoldering inside you - and sometimes burns bright. That thing creates passion in your life, and passion is important - I haven't been passionate about my life in so very long.
3. Personal Improvement - and I mean real personal improvement here, not lip service to something. Maybe it goes hand in hand with the #2, but maybe not. Like I said, I'm trying to get in better shape - I've kept the weight off that I had gained during my late 40's - and I really want to be in the best shape of my life - my mantra is ABS BY MARCH which means working out, eating right. But who am I doing this for? Me or to be "more attractive" to women. I'm really close to become one of those MGTOW types - because I'm a complete pussy around women.
4. The Ability to Say NO - I hate that I don't say NO. Once again, I'm a huge pussy - and I'm still in love with a woman that could give two shits about me as long as the checks still clear. I agree with Rollo when he says that ONEitis is really a mental disorder - because that's what it feels like. When the only time you feel something is with that one person, but everytime you spent time with them, and then they are gone - you just feel empty. It's a fucked feeling - and I don't wish it on anyone.
OK, so at least I know where I'm fucked up - notice that women and dating are not on the list. Personally, I've always noticed that shit takes care of itself in my life - and truly, most women are not that interesting to me anyway. Welcome to my fucked up world. The good thing, is that I know I can get out of this whole, I can move past it - I've been in worse spots in my life - but it sucks when it's happening. [oh, and I do understand there are lots of people that have it much worst than I do - I have a friend that is fighting cancer right now - I'm not dealing with any of that].
Eyes front Gentlemen. Live, Learn, Lead.