Wednesday, December 4, 2013

And we cry in silence...

Rollo put a post yesterday over at The Rational Male - detailing a story of Man discovering his wife of seven years, that he believed to be both inexperienced in sex and mostly disinterested in the whole act, was in fact neither of those two things.  It devastated him and really has shattered what he thought was both his wife and his world.

There is very little I can add to the post, as always, it is well written and articulate.  In the comments, there was some debate about whether this guy should stay and work on his marriage (even after having this new knowledge) or should he just walk away from her, his daughter and seven years of his life.

This man is heartbroken.  His world has changed forever.  He can not go back to "not knowing" what he now knows.  In my opinion, that is the both the burden and the path of a Man.  He is a knowledge seeker, an explorer and with that comes knowledge and experiences that will change his world view, his life and his path - most of those will be "good" things - but a few, will be things he wishes he didn't know, or see.

Once you "take the red pill" you can't go back, backwards is not a path for any of us.  You can only take this new knowledge and figure out what it means to you personally.  How we deal with truth is a very personal journey, there will be people there to help guide you, but they can't take the steps for you.  Men get accused of being callous, being rough, being hard edged - that's true for the most part, and it's really very hard wired into us - because showing emotions is showing weakness.  Once you show weakness, you can't "unshow" it.  Does that mean you have to be strong all the time?  No, it just means you selectively pick and choose who you show your weakness to - it is not for public consumption.

For the most part, Men cry in silence.  They move away from everyone to cry.  Our tears are for us and us alone.  Our weaknesses are held as secrets from the world.  To lead and rule, you have to project strength and confidence - neither of those can be done if people see you cry.  Society has never celebrated our leaders crying in public. 

There are hearbreaking stories of Men out there, we hurt, we cry, we fall down.  The difference is, Men can not base their lives on these events.  We may not be able to undo, unsee, unknow - but we can pick ourselves up and get going.  Even if that next step is to find a place to cry.

Eyes front Gentlemen.  Live, Learn, Lead.

1 comment:

  1. When taking a wife, screeeeeen, screeeeeen, screeeeeen....

    And if possible, take a virgin (deflower her before you marry to ensure no sexual incompatibility or dysfunction that cannot be worked through).

    Wald

    ReplyDelete

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